Mary Oliver's Drunk Substack

I Hung Out With Some of Westminster’s Top Dogs to Steal Their Beauty Secrets

does this count as doggy style or no

May 7 • Lyndsay Rush

38

14

1

April 2026

Thieves Steal 12 Tons Of Kit Kat Bars In Europe Chocolate Heist

Gimme a break-ing news

Apr 7 • Lyndsay Rush

52

8

2

March 2026

It's Never Too Early to Teach Your Baby Math

1 + 1 = shut up

Mar 16 • Lyndsay Rush

64

11

2

December 2025

Look Inside Sheraton Boston’s Whimsical new ‘Goodnight Moon’ Suite

a bit (bowl of) mush

Dec 5, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

47

2

1

November 2025

Stephen King Played Mambo No. 5 So Much His Wife Threatened to Divorce Him Over It

a little bit of Mary (Oliver's Drunk Cousin) all night long

Nov 7, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

54

1

October 2025

Bears Have a Strange Habit; They Sit Just to Admire Nature

pressing paws on everything for just a sec

Oct 17, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

57

9

3

A Big Butt Starfish Just Turned Up on the Coast of Argentina

a butt much, anyone?

Oct 2, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

65

9

6

August 2025

Search Teams in BC Rush To Aid Man— Discover He Was Just Singing Nickelback

🎵 Look at this Substack 🎵

Aug 28, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

40

7

1

Hot Dog Spill Closes Down Interstate 83 in Pennsylvania

it was the brat of times, it was the wurst of times

Aug 7, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

46

4

1

July 2025

Nun’s Skeleton Reveals Some Ancient Women Were Hermits

byzantine-age dream

Jul 31, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

41

7

1

June 2025

Man Balances 96 Spoons on His Body to Break His Own World Record

hell yeah brother

Jun 27, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

51

3

May 2025

Cocaine in the River Thames is ‘Another Problem Eels Don’t Need’ Says Expert

let the soft eel of your body snort what it snorts

May 16, 2025 • Lyndsay Rush

53

9

4